Here I was, struggling. When I could have been living I was existing (barely).
Growing up, my father, a businessman would sometimes ask me to take stock with him or I’d offer to help. He’d call out numbers and I’d press them into the calculator and call back to him. Sometimes he’ll ask “I di kwa sure?” I’d say ” yes daddy, I’m sure” and show him the dim calculator screen. At the end of calling numbers back and forth and totalling he’d either say” this year I lost a lot of money” or “I made a lot of profit this year”.
It is very important to take stock especially of your life. It helps to see how aligned you are with your goals. I know a lot of people are against the ” new year new me” mantra but let’s be honest, don’t we all like new bedsheets? A fresh haircut? So why shouldn’t people aspire to a new self in the new year?
In taking stock of my 2017 here’s what I’ve gathered
I was struggling
Stubborn about some wrong things.
Introduced to my ego.
Met narcissists ,was love bombed, devalued, abused, discarded and devalued again.
Disappointed my self and someone I care about.
But despite all the bad above,in 2017 I began and completed my NYSC successfully.
I saw a clearer picture of the world (everything is never as it seems).
I began to live and take up space like I’m supposed to.
Lost toxic weight and gained healthy weight.
Meeting my ego led to revisiting childhood traumas that shaped some of my insecurities.
Revisiting these traumas had me dealing with them.
My goals are clearer to me
Most importantly I met God and myself.
All in all, my attitude to my life got better in 2017 and despite the losses, boy did I gain and for this I am thankful. How did 2017 go for you?
See you in 2018, living and doing your best yet.
Chidimma Akubue ❤